The Courage To Go For It

by Coach Cary Bayer

"Success is not in never falling but in rising every time you fall."--Vince Lombardi

Vince Lombardi, who coached the Green Bay Packers to victories in the first two Super Bowls, was not just a taskmaster obsessed with winning; he was also a coach committed to having players give their all, and not give up. It's fundamental to the yang world of football as much as to the yin world of hypnotherapy, psychotherapy, chiropractic, energy medicine, and every other form of healing modality. Mary Pickford, the movie star who co-founded United Artists with Charlie Chaplin and Douglas Fairbanks, wrote: "If you have made mistakes...there is always another chance for you...you may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing we call 'failure' is not the falling down, but the staying down."

It's not the falling down, but the staying down. This is precisely where so many healers get confused. They have dreams of developing their therapeutic business in a particular way but their fears of doing whatever it is they'd have to do to realize their dreams stops them. They fear that if they go for what they really want--like creating a very well known and very successful practice, for example--they might fail. They might like to do chair massage in corporations or incorporate an exotic modality they might have just learned at a convention, but are afraid to approach corporate executives, or are scared such techniques might cause some more conservative clients to think less favorably of them. They think that failing in and of itself is some kind of terrible thing. (In baseball, the best players like Willie Mays, for example, make it to the Hall of Fame even if they fail 70 percent of the time.) The truth is you fail if you don't try. Future hockey Hall of Famer Wayne Gretzky, who scored more goals than anyone else, said, "You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take." Imagine what would happen if you started to take some new shots like going after more affiliations with doctors, spas, or holistic centers; like studying new techniques; or like going after more clients by marketing yourself in a big way.

I coach my massage therapist and other healer clients that success results from living life with gusto. Every time you go after what you really want, you win. That's because going after what you really want involves the unfolding of your inner being and requires overcoming your fear and resistance--and that's a huge win. If your actions don't meet with the results you desire, you still win, for the simple reason that you went after what your heart truly desired. There are also times, however, that you win twice; because sometimes when you go after what you really want, a wonderful thing happens--you get it.

Having privately coached more than 150 massage therapists, I've seen how they can be so frightened of feeling discomfort, that, at the slightest tinge of fear, they pull back and never go after what their hearts desire. Others give up after one failed attempt. I coach my psychotherapist and alternative healer clients to persevere, to commit, to show the Universe that they mean business. When they do, the Universe shows its commitment to their commitment and responds in a positive way with support. Synchronicities take place, and they find themselves in the right place at the right time meeting the right people. It could happen anywhere--on a supermarket checkout line, at the dry cleaners, at a Starbucks. They might find their next client; their next corporate human resource manager to hire them to do a big chair massage program; their next holistic center director who's looking for an alternative healer to come in a couple of days a week.

Imagine how many more decades of slavery the Hebrew people might have had to endure had Moses given up each time the hard-hearted Pharoah refused to let his people go. Thomas Edison, who failed some 10,000 times in experiments to find the proper material for the filament in his light bulb, wrote: "Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up." You might be reading these words by candlelight had Edison been a quitter. Consider this: the genius inventor was actually grateful each time an experiment failed. His rationale was simple: he knew that he had one less road to go down to reach his goal. Imagine conducting your healing business with such certainty, faith, patience and fortitude.

Many healers believe that if things don't come easily, it must not be what the Universe wants for them. This couldn't be further from the truth. Liberation didn't come easily for the Hebrews even with Moses working as a veritable channel for the Highest Power of the Universe. Nirvana didn't come immediately to the Buddha either; he had his own challenges to deal with. Think of your favorite movie: doesn't the hero or heroine overcome some obstacle to realize a higher greatness? The Universe often wants to see what you're made of, and wants to see your commitment. Show your mettle and your desire and you will receive support to handle the obstacles.

Beverly Sills, the great opera singer, wrote, "You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don't try." When you pursue your desires with passion--whether they're desires for enriching your personal life or desires for expanding your healing business--life becomes infinitely richer even if you don't succeed. To taste heaven on earth, you must reach beyond your limit. Imagine running your practice and your life the way the hero of Man of La Mancha did in that show's classic song, The Impossible Dream:

"To reach the unreachable star
This is my quest
To follow that star
No matter how hopeless
No matter how far."

You can create a healing business that grows out of your deepest dreams. Now isn't that something worth getting up for each morning?

Cary Bayer (www.carybayer.com) was keynote speaker at the 2006 American Massage Therapy Association national convention. Widely known as The Business Coach for Massage Therapists, Cary is a Life Coach; CE provider licensed by NCBTMB and Florida Dept. of Health's Board of Massage Therapy; and faculty member of Massage Business University, he writes for Massage Today, massage publications in 14 states, and a syndicated column, "Life 101," that runs in wellness publications. His 27 publications include 11 specifically for massage therapists. He's coached some 150 LMTs and dozens of alternative healers. His CE seminars, "Build a $100,000 a Year Massage Business" and "Healer, Heal Thyself," are very popular among alternative facilitators.